Kirby Lee

I am Kirby, like you, a pilgrim in life, death and transition.

I offer compassionate accompaniment through times of transition, providing emotional, practical, and spiritual care.

As a technician and student of the sacred, I accompany the deeply intimate rites of passage that come with dying and death through ritual, ceremony, death care, and after-death care.

My Services

I accompany anyone who wishes to have my services, meeting them wherever they are in their journey.

I specialize in supporting those who are choosing alternatives to institutionalized end-of-life care, and who want to take active roles in their dying process or for caring for their loved ones in ways that reflect their values and beliefs. This includes:

  • Supporting individuals who wish to remain at home through the dying process.

  • Creating sacred spaces for vigil—containers that hold both joy and sorrow, gently easing fear and crisis.

  • Providing after-death care with reverence and compassion.

  • Holding home funerals or meaningful rituals after death in personalized settings, where families are active participants in caring for their loved ones.

  • Guiding decisions about body disposition in ways that honor the life lived and the values of those involved.

  • In this offering, I walk families or individuals through their care wishes over several sessions. I recommend at least three 1-hour sessions, during which we explore elder and end-of-life care, death care, and after-death care. You will also receive a 40-page booklet as a guide for defining how you can care for your parents—or how you would like to be cared for—during medical crises or at the end of life.

    This is a practical guide approached with contemplation, creating space to live and die more consciously.

  • I work alongside Hospice offering non-medical support at the end of life and during the dying process. I offer a calm, compassionate presence to ensure wishes are upheld. I provide steady support to both the person who is dying and their circle of care, helping to cultivate a space of connection, reverence, and rest.

  • After a death, there is still care to be given. I support families in tending to the body with reverence and calm, honoring cultural, spiritual, or personal practices. This may include gentle washing, anointing, dressing, and creating a sacred space, following a pace that feels natural and that honors the wishes of there person who has died.

    Whether guiding a home vigil, preparing for a home funeral, or coordinating with funeral homes or hospice, I offer presence and practical support so that this tender time may unfold with intention, dignity, and love.

  • As a Home Funeral Guide, I educate and empower families to exercise the innate right of caring for their own dead.

    A home funeral allows families to care for their loved one after death in the comfort and intimacy of their own home. This practice honors the natural rhythms of grief, providing time and space for meaningful rituals, personal farewells, and community support.

    I collaborate with families and licensed funeral directors to preserve the family's autonomy in creating a personalized and meaningful farewell.

    Whether you're interested in a quiet vigil, a ceremony that reflects your loved one's values, or guidance through the legal processes, I offer support to help you navigate this sacred time with intention and care.

About me

I have always been a “helper,” and my path has led me to supporting people at the end of their lives. During my 2 years living in Central Mexico, I trained with a team of Life, Death, and Transition Doulas through the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, where I discovered the possibilities beyond institutionalized end-of-life care. I am deeply passionate about reclaiming death as a natural, family- and community-centered process—one that honors choice, autonomy, and empowerment for the dying person and their circle of care. I offer heart-centered, compassionate support to accompany the dying and care for their loved ones through the transition.

For the past 5 years, I have been working as an end of life and death doula, elder caregiver, and Hospice home health aide. I am trained by Henry Fersko-Weiss, the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, Deanna Cochran’s CareDoula program, Anne-Marie Keppel, The Center for Sacred Deathcare and Hudson Valley Hospice. My greatest teachers have been those I have accompanied.

"Death is our friend precisely because it brings us into absolute passionate presence with all that is here, all that is natural, all that is love."

— Rainer Maria Rilke